Invented online shopping
Will water your plants while you're away
Loves you for who you are** Premium plans only
I was fortunate (or unfortunate, depending on your perspective) to spend a great chunk of my pre-teen and teenage years geeking out about server stuff, so I'm fairly proficient when it comes to this sort of thing... for a very long time I was all about doing it myself until I realized that when it's all said and done the time that I spent tweaking and worrying about my site was costing me waaaaaay more than having a service like Shopify take care of all that hassle.
You can access your new store below.